Here’s my story. Has this ever happened to you?
I thought I was fat. Back then, “smile!” for the camera… and I was moaning to myself, “oh my God, I’m huge…” Sigh.
Having recently come across this photo, imagine my surprise when my first thought was “man, I looked pretty good… who knew I had such muscle tone?” Well, not me apparently. I didn’t see it then.
WTF? (As in, What The — Fat?!)
WTF? (As in, What’s The Fact?)
WTF? (As in, What’s That Feeling?)
WTF? (As in, Where’s The Freedom?)
Clearly, my vision has changed. So how did this happen?
Clearly, my perspective on my body has changed. How?
One word: Love.
Well, technically two words: Self Love.
Back then, I struggled in a pit of slimy, gross self loathing. My vibe was hateful towards myself. I detested my physical form: my thighs were too big, I was too short, my face too round, blah blah blah… you get it. Defects. That’s all I saw.
Somewhere along the way, during my growing up years, I missed the lesson on “hey, love yourself because you are just freaking loveable!” Circumstances happened, parts of my life were difficult and confusing to me, and I figured that I must be unworthy, unloveable, of no value. Conclusion: I was defective. And I held this skewed way of thinking for yeeeeeeears. It became the way I breathed.
Breath in: I suck.
Breath out: yup, still suck.
Because of this wrong way of thinking, I developed habits that were not healthy: disordered eating, anxiety, fear, dysfunctional relationships, addictions. Self loathing. Thinking I’m ugly. Oh-God-they’ve-got-the-camera-out panic. Stomachaches. Constipation. OCD.
Who would have thought that the cure for all this madness was Love? Specifically, Love of myself.
Me. Loving Me.
It’s been a journey. And one about which I’ll write another 700 blogs, I’m sure. Because the journey continues. I consider myself a recovering lover.
With new eyes… to see the truth (that I’m loveable.)
With new ears… to hear the truth (that I’m valuable.)
With new heart… to receive the truth (that I’m worthy.)
Hey, if nobody ever told you when you were a kid, let me shout it out now:
HEY, LOVE YOURSELF BECAUSE YOU ARE FREAKING LOVEABLE!
Energiegal here… Love works. LIFT the vibe of our world.