WORTHY OF SUCCEEDING
Chewed up a trail run race today with Bestie. She kicked my hind end and encouraged me the whole way. Could I be more fortunate?
I’m glad for her encouragement because the voices in my head were having a bit of a pow-wow. The loudest went something like this:
“Who do I think I am? I’m not built for this. I will inevitably fail, disappointing myself and others. I should slow down… give up trying to go fast… stop dreaming about being proud of myself…. Gah, who do I think I am?”
I could hear my feet hit the ground, feel my heart pounding in my chest. My throat ached from pulling in the cool air. I was sprinting the whole race.
I wanted to give up.
Give in.
Maybe that voice was right… who did I think I was?
Besides, how could I be so selfish as to want to experience triumph?
Shouldn’t I want others to win? How could I be so self-absorbed?
Indeed… who did I think I was?
And then.
Another voice, louder but very calm, self-assured: I AM A MIRACLE.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Marianne Williamson
Wow!
Who am I NOT to run, dream, hope, and cross the finish line leaving every single bit of me on that course? Who am I NOT to train and sweat and give it my all? Who am I NOT to leave it all out there and be so damn proud of myself, regardless of podium-status… Who am I NOT to shine and manifest the glory of God?
I AM A MIRACLE.
I am a child of God.
I am not here to play small, shame myself, walk on eggshells, or shrink so that others don’t feel bad about themselves because I kicked butt.
I AM A MIRACLE.
I am a child of God.
I am meant to shine.
At the urging of my Bestie, I sprinted those last few yards to the finish line. “Lisa, do not hold yourself back… beat me to the finish!” (She may have actually said something like “beat my ass to the finish” but I digress…) 😉
Reviewing this race, I have realized something.
I was not afraid of FAILING so much as I was afraid of SUCCEEDING.
Succeeding… running as quickly as I could, hoping-dreaming-believing for a fantastic race, crossing that finish line having given it every single morsel of energy… to me, succeeding meant I was amazing, not selfish. Brilliant and shiny and, yes, miraculous!
For I dared to dream.
I dared to hope and hold space.
I dared to believe that I am worthy of giving it my all.
I am worthy to hope and hold space for my dreams.
And fall short of them, perhaps.
But dream, nonetheless.
Go for it.
Roar.
Spread my wings and try to fly.
Even if my feet barely left the ground.
So what.
I swung at the ball, baby.
I swung!
(omg, the number of metaphors this girl uses…. eye-roll) 😉
I am starting to understand that my playing small doesn’t serve anyone, not me and not you. And not the Collective.
My shining with all my bright miraculous amazing-ness does not subtract from you one bit.
Your shining with all of your bright miraculous amazing-ness does not diminish my Light one little ray.
Your succeeding fans the flame in me.
My succeeding fans the flame in you.
Together, we can encourage one another to shine, to be our brilliant miraculous selves. Because sometimes, we forget. Sometimes, we need reminding that we are children of God, born to make manifest the glory of Love.
So, my friend, for the sake of all of us… remember who you are.
YOU ARE A MIRACLE.
Today, I have remembered… I was born for this.
And so were you.
Own your glory.
Own your brilliance.
Shine, baby, shine.
WE ARE MIRACLES.
Contrary to popular thinking, being worthy isn’t something you earn, it’s something you recognize.
Mike Dooley
Amen.
Hugs,
Lisa
EnergieGal 